By Catie Prendergast

Summer students, get ready for construction on UB’s north campus. Starting in June, all the Dells in Lockwood and Capen will be replaced with shiny new Macs. Surprised? So was I. Also a little annoyed, since I am graduating and will never experience this glorious change. But I am happy for the initiative, and relieved that UB is using some extra income for a good cause.

I contacted a UB financial official, who wished to remain anonymous, to get the scoop. “UB has always been reluctant to get Macs for obvious cost reasons,” he said. “But we just discovered that we have a surplus and figured, hey, why not use it for student benefit?”

I couldn’t agree more! I grew up with a PC and got a Mac for college and I’m not hating, but PC’s just ain’t as aesthetically pleasing as Macs. Image may seem like a superficial concept, but it’s in fact very important when it comes to colleges.

“I remember touring UB, and being very turned-off,” said an undisclosed student. “I didn’t apply here because I didn’t want to spend my time at a library that looked so dull.”

“I also was hoping to see Macs when I saw the school,” said another. “Macs just have a good aura, don’t you think?”

Aesthetics aside, the Mac initiative will be a wonderful asset for the design students. Every new computer will come with the full Adobe Creative Suite. No longer will art students be confined to the CFA in order to open Photoshop.

It is also fitting that UB implement the change this year, since our senior class quote is from the late Steve Jobs: “[T]he only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle.”

“The decision to use that Steve Jobs’ quote definitely inspired us,” said the financial official. “Especially the last part—‘never settle.’ Why settle for Dells when we can have Macs?”

UB research has already begun to conduct studies as to how they can make the new computers even more student friendly. “Adding Adobe Creative Suite was definitely the right decision. We have received countless letters of thanks from undergrads, and that is such a nice feeling. Now we need to take this even further and make students worship us.” So far, research has shown an overwhelming number of suggestions about a popular computer game: The Sims.

“I attended one of those underground Mac research sessions,” said one student wearing a hoodie and sunglasses. “I told them they should not only have design programs but games. Like The Sims. The Sims rule!”

“A lot of students want to see The Sims added to the computers,” said the leader of UB research. “If the number is still high by late May, we will include the game into the system.”

Finally, adding Macs may calm down the steady student complaints by a small percentage. “We’re hoping the new computers will keep the students happy enough to stop complaining all the time,” said the official candidly. “I’m not saying students complain unreasonably. There are definitely a lot of things UB could improve. But come on, these students have it good, they just don’t know it.”

They will know it soon, I suppose. New Macs will certainly make a lot of students happy and it may even increase traffic in the libraries.

Those who hate Macs, and they exist, can always go to HSL. “Unfortunately we did not have enough money to extend the initiative to south campus,” said the official. “With the budget, north always comes first, and only if there is left-over do we consider improving south.”

Regardless of south always being left out of upgrades, the new Mac program is a wonderful addition to UB and it is essentially risk-free. Those who will be here for the change, drop me a line. I would love to hear how it’s going and who has the best UB Sims life.

 *NOTE: Please look at the bottom of pg. 3 in our online edition, which can be accessed in http://issuu.com/generation/docs/volume29_issue13.*